Dear 18-Year-Old Me

The response for this post is at Dear 14-Year-Old Me.

Arifah Husna Badlishah.

*cue dramatic music just for a cool sound effect*

Well, first of all, please don’t read this post before your 18th birthday. Unless you have stage three cancer or something and you’re going to die before that. (I hope not!) I know how sneaky and stubborn you are. You know how sneaky and stubborn I am.

Okay, that’s just really confusing.

JUST DON’T, OKAY?

I mean, remember the ‘Dear 13-Year Old Me’ letter? You read it at least five times over the three years you were supposed to not look at it, I’m sure. And now it’s lost! Bagus, bagus.

So if you do decide to be an idiot and actually look at this thing, kindly go back to whatever you were doing, miss.

And no, don’t say “Eh budak kecik, kau siapa nak suruh aku buat apa? Ni hidup aku lah!”

Please, Arifah.

***

Today is the 13th of September, 2011. It’s almost 9PM. I am currently sitting on a red spinning chair with a huge tear in the middle, in the computer room of my lovely home in Subang Jaya. My computer desk is extremely messy.

Here are some examples of the items that can be found on the table.

  • The High School Musical cup Nabilah gave me
  • Princess In Training, the sixth installment of the Princess Diaries (Kashvini lent it to me today)
  • A purple scarf
  • My fake Lesportsac leopard print wallet
  • My blue half-frame spectacles
  • Three motivational posters I just bought at Petronas in hope that I’ll do something useful when I see them stuck on the walls
  • My drawing tablet that I hardly use anymore (I got it as a 5A present in Year 5)
  • Orange Tic Tacs
  • My four-year old Sony Ericsson W200 phone that is currently out of battery (too lazy to charge)
  • Arif’s book “Diary Of A Wimpy Kid: Rodrick Rules” (Note to self: WATCH THE MOVIE. DEVON BOSTICK!)
  • Files of T.A.F
  • A printer that can’t print

Well, to refresh your memory, I am a brilliantly talented, gorgeous, kind-hearted, hardworking, fourteen-year old student who studies at SMK USJ 4. My family is still very much alive and healthy, and I love them to death. I love Harry Potter, Glee, Doctor Who and Disney. Also, I drink Milo several times a day. …You didn’t get diabetes from that, right?

*eats a Tictac*

WELL, LET’S NOT WASTE MUCH TIME TALKING ABOUT ME. WHAT ABOUT YOU? (WHO IS LITERALLY ME) Answer all these questions in a blog post! You need to be prepared for interviews if you want to become a world-famous author! Have fun answering them, with a post entitled “Dear 14-year old me”. *evil laugh* (Though you’ll probably enjoy answering them.)

a) Where are you now? I’m sure you got straight A’s for your PMR and SPM because you changed from being the lazy me to the hardworking, intelligent you! (Or not…) Did you shift to any schools? Are your friends still your friends? Do you pray five times a day? Have you (finally) khatam Al-Qur’an? Are you still addicted to Milo? Did you finish the seventh book on Pottermore? Are you healthy?

b) How is everyone? Did Mum publish a book yet? Did Dad become a millionaire yet? Arif did get 5A’s for his UPSR, and how is he coping with middle school? Is Aimi a good second-grader? Are Grandpa and Grandma still happily travelling around the world every other month like the power couple they are? Nabilah and Ammar have adjusted fine to Malaysian life, haven’t they? Did Auntie and Uncle Nan send them to private school? Does Uncle B have children yet? What about Tok and Tok Wan? And all the other relatives and cousins on Mum’s side of the family? And the rest of Dad’s side of the family? Of course, not forgetting your friends! Who went where?! I’m desperate to know. Hope everyone is alive and well.

c) What university/college (and course) are you in?This is kind of related to question a). So, where are you studying now? Is it far from home? Who sleeps in your room now? Do the glow-in-the-dark stars in there still exist? Did you bring your Harry Potter books to college? I’m very sure that you are currently studying for your exams to study in the UK/USA, whatever they’re called. I can’t be bothered to look it up now. Unless you’re going to France or somewhere like that. Speaking of France, are you a pro at speaking French already? If so, please reply this in French. Kthxbai. Just kidding. Or are you  only studying creative writing in Malaysia? I highly hope that you are not a beggar on the street. Or a drug addict. Or a smoker. Or an alcoholic. Or a murderer. Or a rapist. Or even a terrorist.

d)  Do you have a driver’s license? You’d better. Unless you tumpang the cars of your friends every other day, or if you’re living in a different country. Because if not, and you have no other good reasons, I hate you. I hate you so very much. That means you were either careless enough not to pass your driving test, or you didn’t take it at all. Remember, the you of four years ago is desperate to own a driver’s license so that she can feel like a free woman for once.

e) How is your love life? Do you have a boyfriend? Did anyone ever propose to you (Or confess their undying love, at the very least)? Do you have any ex-boyfriends? Yes, I know these are sensitive questions. It is for me too because I’m just an ugly, unpopular, clumsy, lazy, extremely misunderstood kid, but I’m sure you’ve grown to be a very pretty, intelligent, independent, nice woman who all the boys crawl for. (You’re probably glaring at me right now. Sorry.) If things are still bad, don’t worry! Your knight in shining armour is out there somewhere!

f) Are you working on your dreams? You are on your way to being the next hit writer, aren’t you? Have you finished plotting T.A.F? Are you known for your writing yet? Have you wrote any epic fanfiction? Did you take writing classes over the years? Are you studying creative writing in university, or going to soon? When are you going to get a move on? Remember, Steven Spielberg can’t wait forever to direct the movies for your books. Or… (if this has happened, I salute you. SO MUCH. YOU ARE AWESOME. I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT!) are you published?! Please don’t give up on writing. I beg you. Even if you become an interior designer, or a humanitarian worker, or a boring teacher, or even a toilet cleaner… don’t give up.

g) Any other things I should know?I mean… what happened over the past four years? Has the education system changed? Did any legendary stars pass away? Did they invent the iPhone 50? Did any horrible things like 9/11 happen? Did anyone in school get pregnant or raped or anything? Did world hunger end? Did tigers become extinct? Did the North Pole melt? Do you (finally) own a bicycle or a cat?

***

Wow, this post is really long so far. I’m about to make it longer by talking about my day.

I woke up late. Really late. 11:45am, to be exact. Then I told Arif to read The BFG and rushed for school. For some reason, my bag felt light. A little too light. Only at school, I realized I forgot to bring all my Science books. Crap. Dreaded Science for the rest of the day.

BM was free time as usual, since Puan R is still on maternity leave and there are no replacement teachers to teach. I understand more or less of Maths. We’re learning Solid Geometry now. But the formulas to get the surface area of each shape are a pain to remember. I lent “Does My Head Look Big In This?” to Kashvini. Idzni wants to borrow it too. Kash says she finds it interesting so far. I borrowed Princess In Training from her.

Studied literature for English. Had to answer questions about Rumpelstiltskin, again. I really wish people would stop seeing poor old Rumpel as the bad guy. In my eyes he did nothing wrong. All he did was ask for Lisa’s first-born child, in return for saving her life. Yes, it is a huge price to pay but if Lisa couldn’t pay it then she shouldn’t have promised that to him. Lisa was kind of a jerk. And what about the King? He got the girl, the gold and the child when he threatened to cut his future wife’s head off three times and locked her in a room three times forcing her to spin straw into gold! No justice at all!

Rehat… the usual. The koperasi was closed, so I couldn’t buy Lexus biscuits. Ended up buying Apollo and a bottle of mineral water. Not really satisfying since I had a light lunch, but I was grateful. My life is much better than the starving kids of Somalia, right? I’ll make a mental note to donate to them.

Science. I waited for that horrible moment for Puan Wahida to realize I didn’t bring my books. Even though I was scribbling notes into my orange Change notebook. I just tried to keep up with the talk of hydrostatic skeletons. But luckily she wasn’t mad when she found out… much. She just gave me that you’d-better-not-forget-next-class look. Alhamdulillah.

PJK. Did way more talking than actually exercising, as usual. The ratio is probably 50-0.

Tomorrow, I’m going on a field trip to SMK Jalan Empat. Bought hot-and-spicy flavoured Mr. Potato to eat in the bus. Better go charge my phone and my iPod. Bye then!

Oh, I forgot. Happy 18th birthday! I am so insensitive. Heheh. HAVE A BLAST! You’ve been waiting for 18 all your life! As Dobby would say, “Dobby is a free elf! Dobby has no master!”. You can do whatever the heck you want! Just… don’t get too wild, okay? Remember Allah! Remember heaven and hell!

Sincerely,

Arifah of 13th September 2011

P.S. Please don’t think I’m an idiot. I took an hour and twenty minutes out of my young, naive, teenage life to write this post.

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